Book Review: “Ugly” by Margaret McHeyzer

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I received a copy of this ebook via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

Lily Anderson has been hurt since she was young. She lives with her Dad, having lost her Mum a few years previous. Her Dad gets abusive, made worse by his constant drinking. When she meets Trent, she realises that there is someone out there who cares about her, and who wants to make her happy. Is Trent really too good to be true?

I am reluctant to say I liked this book due to the nature and content, but I did think it was a good book. I really felt for Lily, and I understand from her past why she did not tell anybody what was happening. I am really glad that Shayne was in her life, and that after everything that happened, Shayne was always there for her.

There were a few grammatical errors and missed words occasionally, and I sometimes had to re-read the same sentence to make sure I understood exactly what it said, but the story itself was good.

I rate this book 4/5 stars!

You can find this book on Goodreads here, Amazon UK here and Amazon US here.

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Guest Post: Mudmen: The Quest For Humanity by Shitij Sharma

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Synopsis

What if you thought you could play a better god than God?

Mudmen is a story unlike anything you have ever seen before. It all starts with a half-crazed dwarf scribbling furiously on a piece of paper while the world outside his little cottage is ravaged by a great storm. There is an artifact in his possession which gives him power over all else, but that artifact is stolen by the very creatures that he gave birth to in his frustration – these creatures are what we come to know as the Mudmen.

Links

You can find the book on Goodreads here, Amazon UK here and Amazon US here.

Author Links

You can find the author on Facebook here, Twitter here, WordPress here and his instagram name is @shitijs.

 

 

Guest Post: Proud American: The Migrant, Soldier And Agent by Sergio A. Tinoco

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Synopsis

Being the only child of a single mother, Sergio was raised by his maternal grandparents in a South Texas region better known as the Rio Grande Valley. This memoir details the upbringing of a poor Migrant worker of Mexican descent having to pick crops for a living since the age of seven.

As a way to break from the family cycle of picking crops and depending on government welfare programs, he joined the United States Army and served ten years active duty. He deployed to Bosnia-Herzegovina shortly after the Bosnian War only to find and deal with the aftermath of the genocide that took place there and be caught in the middle of several attacks. His experiences in Bosnia ultimately led to experiencing signs and symptoms related to PTSD.

After completing ten years of military service, Sergio joined the U.S. Border Patrol. Being of Mexican descent, having family in south Texas, and in Mexico gave way to new issues of having to counter threats against his family and ill-willed opinions of him for arresting and deporting “his own kind.”

Links

You can find the book on Goodreads here, Amazon UK here and Amazon US here.

You can also find the book on the official website here. The book trailer is here and a television interview with the author is here.

Guest Post: Dahler And Nicholls Fight Crime! (Crime Wins) by Dixie J. Whitted

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Synopsis

The humorous cartoon adventures of two hapless heroes, Dahler & Nicholls, dedicated officers of the law, who, with the aid of their intrepid four-legged assistant Horatio, try their level best to “make the streets safe for decent citizens.”

Sometimes they succeed…

Links

You can find the book on Goodreads here, Amazon UK here and Amazon US here (the paperback also doubles as a colouring book).

You can also find it on Barnes and Noble here.

Picture Excerpts

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Microsoft Word - Dahler and Nicholls Fight Crime Crime WinsCreat

Book Tour and Giveaway: Toru: Wayfarer Returns by Stephanie R. Sorensen

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Synopsis

A nation encircled by enemies

A noblewoman with everything to lose

A fisherman with everything to prove and a nation to save.

In Japan of 1852, the peace imposed by the Tokugawa Shoguns has lasted 250 years. Peace has turned to stagnation, however, as commoners grow impoverished and their lords restless. Swords rust. Martial values decay. Foreign barbarians circle the island nation’s closed borders like vultures.

Tōru, a shipwrecked young fisherman rescued by traders and taken to America, defies the Shogun’s ban on returning to Japan, determined to save his homeland from foreign invasion. Can he rouse his countrymen in time? Or will the cruel Shogun carry out his vow to execute all who set foot in Japan after traveling abroad? Armed only with his will, a few books, dirigible plans and dangerous ideas, Tōru must transform the Emperor’s realm before the Black Ships come.

About The Author

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Stephanie is a writer based in the Victorian mining town of Leadville, Colorado, where she lives at 10,251 feet with her husband, five chickens, two bantam English game hens and one Cavalier King Charles Spaniel. After a former life in big cities-New York City, Tokyo, Hong Kong, Boston, Mexico City, Atlanta, Los Angeles and Santa Fe-she now enjoys the birdsong and quiet writing time she finds in Leadville. Her first novel draws on her experience living and working in Japan;

her next historical novel is set in Mexico where she also lived for several years. As a Leadville local, she likes her Victorian attire spiced with a little neo-Victorian futurism and the biggest bustle possible.

Recognition for “Toru: Wayfarer Returns”

— Finalist, Fantasy category, 2016 Next Generation Indie Book Awards

— Bronze Medal Award, Multicultural Fiction category, 2016 eLit Book Awards

Author Links

Author website – http://stephaniersorensen.com/

Author Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100011148014463

Publisher website – http://palantirpress.com/

Publisher Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/people/Sassa-Margot/100010457895534

Publisher Twitter – https://twitter.com/SassaMargot

Sell sheet PDF – http://palantirpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/08/Toru-Sell-Sheet.pdf

Kirkus review – http://www.kirkusreviews.com/book-reviews/stephanie-r-sorensen/toru/

Historical Novel Society review – https://historicalnovelsociety.org/reviews/toru-wayfarer-returns-sakura-steam-series-book-1/

Barnes and Noble – http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/toru-stephanie-r-sorensen/1123110310?ean=9780996932318

Giveaway – One person will win a $50 Amazon/BN gift card

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Book Excerpt

“No, daughter. You are not coming with us.” The daimyō looked down at his daughter’s norimono palanquin.

She signaled for her bearers to lift her up.

They looked to her father for instruction.

“No!” he bellowed, but his voice bore hints of the frustration of a man who knows he is beaten before the battle even begins.

She signaled once again for her bearers to lift her up. Caught between their implacable mistress and her fierce father, the men looked miserable.

“This is no journey for a woman. We will be gone a week. We have to travel through hostile territory. It is the mud season. There are bandits on the road. We have to move swiftly. Your mother would not approve.” Reasons poured out of the daimyō, endless reasons, all of them quite reasonable, at louder and louder volume.

His daughter made no answer. She merely motioned for the third time for her bearers to lift her up.

“Toranosuke! I command you, stay here!”

At her nickname, the girl finally popped her head outside the norimono in a most unladylike manner. She beamed at her father in joyful triumph, confident now in her victory. “Hai! O-tō-sama! I will stay here! For one hour. To make you happy. And then I will follow you, dressed as a man, riding on a horse, wearing your old hakama. If I obey you and stay here for that hour, you will force me to face the mud and the bandits alone. Surely it is better for me to travel under your protection. You cannot make me stay here. And I will follow you, Father. You know I will.”

 

Book Tour Pre-Release and Giveaway: Ruby And The Beast by Ditter Kellen

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About the Book 

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After the sudden death of her father, Ruby Atwood is forced to drop out of college to care for her younger brother. Deep in debt and on the verge of desolation, Ruby resorts to some shady dealings on the streets of New Orleans, in order to put food on the table for her small family. Until one night in a dark alley, she discovers a hideous beast she could never have imagined in her darkest nightmares.

Cloaked in darkness, the Beast prowls the back alleys of New Orleans, lonely, savage and bereft of hope, his demon clawing at him. With the man responsible for his curse now dead, the Beast seeks out the only other person who can satisfy the demon within—the man’s daughter, Ruby Atwood.

Trapped, with nowhere to run, Ruby quickly realizes she must use her wits to stay alive or face certain death at the hands of a monster. But the more she tries to escape, the more she is drawn to the Beast. Desire and fear clash, creating an unforgettable story of hope, trust and a love found only in fairy tales…

The book is released on April 4th 2017.

Pre-Order Links

Amazon- http://amzn.to/2jzU8f7

Kobo- https://www.kobo.com/us/en/ebook/ruby-and-the-beast-2

iBooks- https://www.kobo.com/us/en/ebook/ruby-and-the-beast-2

Nook- http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/ruby-and-the-beast-ditter-kellen/1125461284?ean=2940153951041

About the Author

ditter-kellen

Ditter Kellen has been in love with romance for over twenty years. To say she’s addicted to reading is an understatement. Her eBook reader is an extension of her and holds many of her fantasies and secrets. It’s filled with dragons, shifters, vampires, ghosts and many more jaw-dropping characters who keep her entertained on a daily basis.

Ditter’s love of paranormal and outrageous imagination have conspired together to bring her where she is today…sitting in front of her computer allowing them free rein. Writing is her passion, what she was born to do. I hope you will enjoy reading her stories as much as she loves spinning them.

Ditter resides in Florida with her husband and many unique farm animals. She adores French fries and her phone is permanently attached to her ear.

Author Links

Website- www.ditterkellen.com

Facebook- https://www.facebook.com/AuthorDitterKellen/

Twitter- https://twitter.com/DitterTheGreat1

Instagram- https://www.instagram.com/ditterkellen/

Blog- www.accordingtoditter.com

Amazon Author Page- https://www.amazon.com/Ditter-Kellen/e/B00A6X4AH0/ref=sr_tc_2_0?qid=1451141206&sr=1-2-ent

GoodReads Author page- https://www.goodreads.com/DitterKellen

Newsletter- http://eepurl.com/b_jfsb

Giveaway

Ditter Kellen is giving away a Kindle Fire at the end of each month until the release date! Enter at her Facebook page here:

https://www.facebook.com/AuthorDitterKellen/photos/a.291282501015462.1073741828.290913027719076/1057839507693087/?type=3&theater

Book Tour: Ascension by Hannah Rials

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About The Book

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Synopsis

Life is supposed to be perfect after Cheyenne Lane’s Ascension ceremony, but it turns out awakening her vampire half only complicates things more. Burdened with a patronizing family and constant surveillance by the Vampire Council, Cheyenne welcomes a summer vacation to the magical city of New Orleans. But Cheyenne quickly realizes that she can’t escape her problems, no matter where she goes.

After seventeen years of fearing exposing her secret to humans, Cheyenne’s world is rocked when she starts to fall for a witch named Eli. When he shows Cheyenne how complex the world really is, she must accept that everything she thought she knew about being a Deuxsang is a lie.

As if all this isn’t problem enough, Cheyenne finds herself the pawn of a conspiracy hatched by those who should be protecting her. Her whole life Cheyenne is told what to believe and who to trust. Now, she’s forced to choose for herself who and what is right. No matter which choice she makes, it will cost her everything.

 Steeped in the mystery, intrigue and rich history of New Orleans and the secretive world of the Deuxsang, teen vampire, Cheyenne, and her forbidden love, Eli, embark on a very different, and vastly more dangerous, journey as the net of betrayal tightens around them. This intense and fresh novel is enchanting, engrossing and impossible to put down right up to the cliffhanger ending. Remember, the end is not the end.

Links

Add to Goodreads

iBookshttps://itun.es/us/JDRDfb.l

KOBO: https://www.kobo.com/us/en/ebook/ascension-74

Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Ascension-Hannah-Rials/dp/1936426005/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1477589265&sr=8-1&keywords=ascension+by+hannah+rials

Amazon Kindlehttps://www.amazon.com/Ascension-Book-1-Hannah-Rials-ebook/dp/B01MDM24XK/ref=sr_1_1_twi_kin_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1486244524&sr=1-1&keywords=ascension+by+hannah+rials

Barnes & Noble: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/ascension-hannah-rials/1124901423?ean=9781936426010

Google Play: https://play.google.com/store/search?q=ascension%20by%20hannah%20rials&c=books

Indigo: https://www.chapters.indigo.ca/en-ca/home/search/?keywords=ascension%20by%20hannah%20rials

Testimonials

“Their love story anchors the novel, the first installment of a series, and sets the stage for the cliffhanger ending. An entertaining and promising series opener about an appealing human and vampire hybrid. “-Kirkus Reviews

What an extraordinary debut novel with new and intriguing twists on vampires—a strong female protagonist as one. I already can’t wait for book two.-Jill Murphy Long, author of The Conduit

This book is by the far the BEST YA/Adult fiction that I’ve read in a very long while. So exciting!-Rebecca F

The wait is over-Ascension is here! Thrilling and entertaining, like the experience on a crazy roller coaster. Hannah has grown into the most amazing writer. Watching her journey has been as much fun as holding the book in my hands. A “must read” for YA and thriller fans!-Valarie B.

Rials has created a complex, fascinating, hidden world within our world. And I think we’re just beginning to scratch the surface.”-Kris Whorton

GIVEAWAY:

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About The Author

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As Maryville native and current college student at University of Tennessee at Chattanooga, Hannah Rials began writing her first novel at age twelve. Eight years later, the result is her newly published YA novel Ascension; a modern day teenage romance filled with “double-blooded” vampires and revenge-seeking witches.

Published by Aletha Press of Maryville, TN, Ascension is Rial’s first novel. When not attending college and spending time with her family, Rials keeps busy by playing with her beloved Corgis, Buddy and Noel, leading a creative writing group at University of Tennessee at Chattanooga and cultivating her writing skills.

“I feel like I am living proof that dreams do come true.”– Hannah Rials

Author Links

WebsiteGoodreadsTwitterFacebook

Ascension Playlist

Spotify Playlist Link: 

https://open.spotify.com/user/herials/playlist/6vueP3xbhRBCJZU6hgrMx9

1. Talk: Kodaline

2. I See Monsters: Ryan Adams

3. Rivers in Your Mouth: Ben Howard

4. Scars: James Bay

5. Villainy: Local Natives

6. Feeling Good: Nina Simone

7. Shrimp Boats: Pete Fountain

8. To Build a Home: The Cinematic Orchestra

9. A Wink and a Smile: Harry Connick Jr. 

10. Barricades: The Saint Johns

11. Take Five: Dave Brubeck

12. Home: AURORA

13. Lorelai: Fleet Foxes

14. In the Mood: Glenn Miller

15. New History: Andy Davis

16. It Must Be Jelly: Glenn Miller

17. Unsquare Dance: Dave Brubeck

18. Mood Indigo: Enoch Light

19. I Could Write a Book: Harry Connick Jr. 

20. They Say: Billie Holiday

21. Clementine: Punch Brothers

22. Slow Dancing in a Burning Room: John Mayer

23. Sure Thing: Miguel

24. Ace of Hearts: Zella Day

25. Cosmic Love: Florence + the Machines

26. Fairytale: Milky Chance

27. Tonight You Belong to Me: Gavin Castleton

28. Witchcraft: Frank Sinatra

29. Gimme All Your Love: Alabama Shakes

30. I Want to Love You: Lenachka

31. Me and You: Jake Bugg

32. Make You Better: The Decembrists

33. (I Do) Like We do: Harry Connick Jr. 

34. Stone Cold: Scott Bradlee’s Post Modern Jukebox

35. Hold My End Up: Delta Spirit

36. i hate u, i love u: gnash 

37. Soon It Will Be Cold Enough to Build Fires: Emancipator

38. Creep: Scott Bradlee’s Post Modern Jukebox 

39. By Some Miracle: Philip Selway

40. Wide Eyes: Local Natives

41. Don’t Forget About Me: Cloves

42. I Found: Amber Run

43. Everyone Loves Everyone: Folk Family Revival

44. Fangs: Night Riots 

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Book Tour: The Remnant by William Michael Davidson

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About The Book

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Synopsis

One nation, without God…

Colton Pierce apprehends Abberants—those who display symptoms of faith—and quarantines them on a remote island to ensure public safety.  Years prior, the government released a genetically-engineered super flu that destroyed the genes believed to be the biological source of spiritual experience in an effort to rid the world of terrorism. As an extractor with the Center for Theological Control, Colton is dedicated to the cause.

But Colton’s steadfast commitment is challenged when he learns his own son has been targeted for extraction. An underground militia, the Remnant, agrees to help Colton save his son in exchange for his assistance with their plan to free the Aberrants on the island.

Colton is faced with the most important decision of his life. Remain faithful to the CTC? Or give up everything to save his son?

Excerpt

Colton changed into one of the CTC’s original extraction outfits for the public service announcement. Although he wished to spend more time making his rounds through headquarters, Kramer insisted that it was more important to film the announcement; the crew was on a tight schedule and it simply had to be done. He put on the silver, full-bodied, armored outfit with the coiled snake—the symbol of the CTC—across the breast, but opted not to wear the helmet. No need. When the CTC was first implemented, helmets had been used to protect the extractors from potential gangs of Aberrants who might fight back. The helmets were long and terrifying, with a breathing vent and two glowing eye filters that allowed extractors night vision when necessary. But the Aberrants rarely fought back and because it was just as easy for extractors to carry night vision goggles with their equipment, the helmets were deemed useless. Still, the public liked the old outfits. They had become a symbol of hope and security.

He checked his hair in the restroom, splashed some water on to tame it, and walked out to the south end of the CTC’s cafeteria where filming was underway.

A film crew congregated by the large windows. Cords snaked across the floor and around tripods, cameras, and lighting equipment. Kramer ushered Colton to the set. A short, pudgy man wearing flannel pulled him in front of the camera and handed him a script. Colton realized that the short guy was the director and he was highly impatient to get this over with. Apparently it had been a long morning, he hadn’t had his coffee yet (at least, Colton heard someone say that), and he had several other workers to film as part of this public service announcement. Colton wasn’t sure who all these other people were, swarming around like gnats, but he assumed they had some purpose in the filming.

“You’ve looked at your lines, right?” the director barked.

“Of course.”

“Usually, we bring in actors for these parts, so we’re hoping you get this right.”

“Not a problem. I can—”

Colton was interrupted when a lady with long blonde hair ran up to him and began to powder his face. He recoiled and began to cough, but the makeup woman hardly slowed down.

“So you have them memorized? Right?” the director barked for a second time.

“Yes, yes I do.”

At least, he thought he did. He’d been given the script a week ago in preparation for this day and had looked it over for ten or fifteen minutes. It was quite short, and even if he was off on a few sections, how could it hurt? The whole point of the script was to remind the community to be vigilant in looking for Aberrants and to be aware of the symptoms. The best way to ensure public safety was simply to keep your eyes open and to be informed. Would it really hurt if he didn’t do this word-for-word? It wasn’t a big deal.

“Okay, okay,” the director said. He paced back and forth for a few seconds and then took a seat in a folding chair. He looked over at the man operating the camera and gave him a quick thumbs up. “Just look at the camera, act confident, and say your lines. We have about twenty other people we need to film, so let’s get this over with quickly, okay?”

Links

THE REMNANT is available to order in eBook form at the following sites:

Amazon

Barnes & Noble

Kobo

iTunes

The print format of the book is available at these sites:

Amazon 

Barnes & Noble

Chapters-Indigo

Book Depository

Foyles

Mediander

Fiction DB

Be sure to add THE REMNANT to your bookshelf on Goodreads.

Author’s Bio

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William Michael Davidson lives in Long Beach, California with his wife and two daughters. A believer that “good living produces good writing,” Davidson writes early in the morning so he can get outside, exercise, spend time with people, and experience as much as possible.

 A writer of speculative fiction, he enjoys stories that deal with humanity’s inherent need for redemption.

 For more on Davidson and his writing, connect with him on Goodreads, Twitter, Facebook, and Amazon Author’s Page.

Giveaway

a Rafflecopter giveaway

This is a tour-wide giveaway for two (2) print copies that are available to those living in the U.S. only and one (1) eBook copy available international. The giveaway will end at 12 a.m. (EST) on Sunday, Feb. 26. You can enter to win at each stop of the tour.

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Book Tour: If I Were Beautiful by Devon Hartford

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About The Book

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Synopsis:

Is life better when you’re beautiful?

Jane Johnson has tried every beauty tip and trick known to woman, but none of them have ever made men notice her.

Until now.

Finally, something is working. She barely recognizes herself in the mirror. Is it her new haircut? Two years of yoga class? Her new eyebrow tweeze? Or is it all that nasty wheat grass juice her sister insisted she drink finally working some kind of magic? Whatever it is, something is transforming Jane from plain to downright beautiful.

For the first time in her life, men are noticing her.

Constantly.

Jane is getting so much attention from men she doesn’t know what to do with it.

Before her inexplicable transformation, she couldn’t get a date to save her life. Now she has a date every night of the week. Gorgeous eligible men are throwing themselves at her. They’re even fighting over her. Actual fist fights to win her affection.

It all seems too good to be true.

The only question on Jane’s mind is whether or not her newfound beauty is going to last or if it’s some cruel trick of fate that will fade away as quickly as it appeared.

Because everybody knows, when something seems too good to be true, it probably is.

***If I Were Beautiful is a saucy romance with a mystical twist that will leave you breathless to find out what happens next. This is book one of a three book series. Book two will release April 2017, Book three, July 2017 (or sooner).

Links

Devon Hartford is a dude who writes romantic comedies because he likes to laugh as much as he likes to love.

Join Devon’s newsletter and you’ll receive teasers of his upcoming books before anyone else, exclusive freebie short stories and novellas, and no spam. Copy and paste this link into your web browser to sign up: http://www.devonhartford.com/newsletter/

Author links:
Excerpt

I had just gone insane.

Or had a stroke.

Or maybe I was still asleep.

Whatever it was, there was no rational explanation for what I saw in the mirror.

Someone else.

Not pudgy little me with bad hair.

Some supermodel I didn’t recognize.

I blinked several times.

But I still saw the supermodel.

I was hallucinating.

I squeezed my eyes shut and rubbed them until I saw stars. Then I opened them.

Still seeing a supermodel.

Long flowing blonde hair, a bit messy and bedish, but it was silky and shiny gold and looked good enough for a photo on a box of hair dye.

A finely shaped face with high cheekbones, trim nose, wide full mouth and lush lips. Her lashes were naturally thick. When she smiled, she had perfectly straight white teeth.

The supermodel was taller than my five foot nothing. If I had to guess, I’d say she was almost 5’9” with long and slender arms and legs and an hourglass figure.

Then it hit me. I was looking through a window at another person. It was the only thing that made sense.

So I stuck my head slowly out my bathroom door to see if the blonde supermodel was standing on the other side of the wall, looking at me through a window. Super Blonde matched my movements exactly and, surprise surprise, she wasn’t standing behind the wall in my hallway.

Nobody was.

Back in front of the mirror, I scratched my head for a moment and Super Blonde did too.

Wait.

Wait, wait, wait.

Duh.

I wasn’t wearing my glasses. I was just imagining all this. The brain can be like that. Wishful thinking and that sort of thing. Probably left over hallucination from my crazy five day flu.

I walked into my bedroom and found my glasses on the nightstand where I always left them before bed. I put them on.

Whoa!

I couldn’t see!

My glasses really hurt my eyes.

I yanked them off and looked at them. Were these my glasses? They seemed like it. Was it an old pair? Maybe that was it. I put them on again. My entire bedroom squiggled and vibrated and had this magnified quality that made me nauseous. I took them off and searched through my desk for a different pair. Put those on. Same thing. They hurt my eyes too. I went back in the bathroom with my glasses and put them on in front of the mirror. Same result. They hurt my eyes and blurred everything, so I set them on the counter.

Had someone given me LASIK while I was asleep?

I’d think about that later because one thing remained the same, whether I had my glasses on or off.

I was the blonde supermodel in the mirror.

Giveaway

Book Tour: Eidolons by Harrison Fountain

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About the Book

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When TK dies in a car accident, the Grim Reaper gives him a second chance at life, but he says it’s more fun being a ghost. As he haunts his small Iowa town, his sleek shell of sarcasm cracks to a terrified lonely inner self. Find out why he’d rather be dead.

Author Bio

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These author bios are generally in third person, right? That’s a little weird for me so—

Harrison Fountain said, “In Kindergarten, Mrs. Augustson sent me to Special Ed because of my speech impediment, the result of a 4-year-long ear infection that garbled the input and so a few letters needed the pronunciation corrected. I had to work on my Ss, Cs, Ks, Ws, Rs, Bs, Ps, Ts, Qs, Ds, Xs, Ls, and Ns.

Every year in elementary school, Scholastic gave students a hardback book with empty cream pages for us to scribble in as part of a school-wide contest. I never won. The kid in my grade who did plagiarized If You Give A Mouse a Cookie and those biased, paid-off judges didn’t even mention my amalgamation of the Silver Surfer and the Human Torch.

Still, I kept writing, finishing my first novel in my 7th grade Physical Science spiral notebook where the narrator’s best friend was an orange alien with green hair named Carrot. My next novel about a boxer, I started in high school before I’d ever even watched boxing, and fighters called out their moves (“The Double Rocket Upper—no, wait! It’s a TRIPLE ROCKET UPPERCUT!!!”) like they were Pokemon.

No one taught me to write until my second year at college when Mr. Johnson called me to his office as he did with all his creative writing students and then he bloodied my first draft of a character sketch claiming his marks were “just ink.” I almost cried. A few visits later, I’d written a character sketch about my sister’s divorce and the family dog. He crossed out a lot like usual. Told me why. Then he scrawled an A at the top. It’d be my first published short story (http://www.orangepeals.com/short-stories/loving-a-mutt/).

The pride felt earned for once.

While studying in Wales without satellite TV or an Xbox, I started a blog called Nothing Fazes a Ghost, where I posted weekly chapters. Those 10,000 views with ad revenue earned enough for a pizza. After a few years and a few drafts, it became Eidolons.

I also teach English to adorable Korean kids who, in turn, teach me cutie poses.”

Links

http://www.orangepeals.com/short-stories/typos

Buy on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Eidolons-Harrison-Fountain/dp/0692652353/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1479225852&sr=8-1&keywords=eidolons+harrison

Book Excerpt

One afternoon, I woke up dead.

I blinked away the drowsiness and wiped at my eyes for any crusties. My back was to the sky and I was looking at my body while floating, then the Iowa crowd gathered like it was time to judge the fattest sow, raised and named by little Mary Sue Ellen, soon to be chopped behind the curtain, but this was less gruesome. Smaller crowd. Today, they were here to see the oozing gashes, my arm bone poking through the flesh, and the bump on my head. It was a nasty one. Even as a ghost I felt it.

A fat man rushed to help. Apparently he had taken an hour course on CPR and was sure it could help, so he wheezed his bacon breath into my lungs and that leaked into my ribcage through a hole the jagged bone had made. He pounded my chest, bouncing up and down, his back jiggling and energy fading, so he grabbed the nearest college girl by the bangles on her wrist and drafted her help but she shrieked. She wasn’t about to touch my corpse. Maybe if I had showered that morning she would’ve.

The driver stepped out of the car with the broken headlight and pleaded his case before his peers. “It was an accident! I didn’t see him. He ran out and—I’m so sorry.” It was good practice for court but if the crowd’s reaction was any indication, he needed a pro’s help before he’d get off.

An ambulance came with its lights flashing but siren silent. Just a body retrieval. They didn’t bother weaving through the town square packed with traffic. They honked and people pulled over—some onto the sidewalks which nearly injured other pedestrians.

I floated higher and couldn’t stop as people disappeared, then cars blended with the pavement and only by the glare off their windshields could I pick them out. Buildings turned to little squares until I was lost in the clouds and hacking as I thought they’d choke me like smoke.

My head smacked something and it hurt.

I griped that if that airplane or chopper or spacecraft put a dent in my head I’d put a dent in it. Instead the culprit was the shoe of a girl, floating like me.

“You dead, too?”